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Nexus Clash :: View topic - Ragged Philanthropists declare victory in war on pollution
Posted: Sun May 27, 2012 7:27 pm Post subject: Ragged Philanthropists declare victory in war on pollution
Today, a broad, multipartisan collection of angels, urchins, otters and the occasional mollusk held a press conference at the Nexal Media Press Breakfast Center* declaring victory in our vague, amorphous, undeclared war on environmental degradation. No more shall endangered species of cute marine mammal be imperiled by burning heat and terrible cold. No more shall torrents of offal and demon blood sully the pristine breeding grounds of Aethersprites.** Once again the sun shines brightly in all of Elysium, except for the areas where it is blocked by photogenic forests and our little martini umbrellas.
In response to critics who argued that environmental cleanup would hamper the ability of grasping Dark Oppressor robber barons to CREATE JOBS, a Raggedy spokesmammal countered that we have left in place a very productive Stygian Foundry operated by Nameless Evil Inc. Their CEO was unavailable for comment as all press representatives sent for an interview have been eaten. The foundry runs on Clean Stygian Coal technology and is certified as a net-zero energy balanced building by the Nexal Green Building Council. The Council was also unavailable for comment, as they were all slain by the righteous fury of Namm trying to get to the site from their headquarters in the Dead Caves.
The ceremony was followed by a tree-planting in the newly restored Elysium fields and a furious real-estate shakedown, as well as light refreshments.
*It's between the stately manor of HARD MAN and the place where the Yappie's dogfood delivery trucks ran out of gas. Happy hunting!
**Yes, Aethersprites have breeding grounds. Any further information is available only on a pay-per-view basis only, but you know you want it.
Posted: Sun May 27, 2012 7:59 pm Post subject: Re: Ragged Philanthropists declare victory in war on polluti
Kandarin wrote:
Today, a broad, multipartisan collection of angels, urchins, otters and the occasional mollusk held a press conference at the Nexal Media Press Breakfast Center* declaring victory in our vague, amorphous, undeclared war on environmental degradation. No more shall endangered species of cute marine mammal be imperiled by burning heat and terrible cold. No more shall torrents of offal and demon blood sully the pristine breeding grounds of Aethersprites.** Once again the sun shines brightly in all of Elysium, except for the areas where it is blocked by photogenic forests and our little martini umbrellas.
In response to critics who argued that environmental cleanup would hamper the ability of grasping Dark Oppressor robber barons to CREATE JOBS, a Raggedy spokesmammal countered that we have left in place a very productive Stygian Foundry operated by Nameless Evil Inc. Their CEO was unavailable for comment as all press representatives sent for an interview have been eaten. The foundry runs on Clean Stygian Coal technology and is certified as a net-zero energy balanced building by the Nexal Green Building Council. The Council was also unavailable for comment, as they were all slain by the righteous fury of Namm trying to get to the site from their headquarters in the Dead Caves.
The ceremony was followed by a tree-planting in the newly restored Elysium fields and a furious real-estate shakedown, as well as light refreshments.
*It's between the stately manor of HARD MAN and the place where the Yappie's dogfood delivery trucks ran out of gas. Happy hunting!
**Yes, Aethersprites have breeding grounds. Any further information is available only on a pay-per-view basis only, but you know you want it.
Dukefan would like to note that, much of Elysium remains sullied by taint from the Legions of the Abyss. However, AppleTM has anticipated future market needs, and already begun cleanup operations with the use of patented iInfuse technology.
Also, if you guys would infuse LoA's squares instead of mine, this would probably go faster
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